Archives for humor

Yep, She called Me Ugly; A Flip-Flop Faux-Pas

    In honor of my new book, “Rhinestones on my Flip-Flops,” I remembered a funny flip-flop story that occurred a few days after I was crowned Miss South Carolina-enjoy!     I was riding high after being crowned Miss South Carolina on Saturday night. Now it was time to prepare for the Miss America Pageant. Sitting in the pageant shop my mind was spinning with thoughts of a myriad of things to check off my list before walking on that iconic Atlantic City stage. I sat down by an older woman as I waited to meet with the gown Continue Reading

And The Winner Is…

I was new to the world of pageantry. Interview always grabbed my interest until my pageant coach (yes, they exist, especially in the South) asked me the unthinkable. “Jane,” he said. “Who should win this pageant?” My brain and mouth froze. Seeing the look on my face, my coach challenged me and asked, “Why are you here? Do you want to be the winner or not?” I made the decision to be a winner…at life. Continue Reading

Breast Cancer Saved My Life

While I was speaking at the 50 Shades of Pink event in Castroville, TX, a lovely woman approached me and said, “Breast cancer saved my life.” Her story is nothing short of a miracle. She found a lump in her breast during a self-check examination. After a doctor’s visit, she was diagnosed with Stage 2 Breast Cancer. But this is not the end of the story. Her surgeon also found a more serious problem- a life-threatening aneurysm. After her repair surgery and breast cancer treatment, her passion in life is to speak with women on the importance of having regular Continue Reading

The 'What To Say' Struggle

I was riding high after being crowned Miss South Carolina on Saturday night. Now it was time to prepare for the Miss America Pageant. Sitting in the pageant shop my mind was spinning with thoughts of a myriad of things to check off my list before walking on the stage in Atlantic City. I sat down by an older woman as I waited to meet with the gown designer. “My grand baby is getting a new dress,” said the proud grandmother. “Oh, that is nice.” I replied. “Yes-sire-re, she is gonna be in another beauty pageant. She is the Cucumber Continue Reading

Get Rid Of Anxiety Once And For All

I will never forget the day I started cleaning out our freezer. To be honest, I kept putting stuff in that chest freezer and closing the lid. The day came when the lid would not shut; it was time to organize and throw away all of the anxiety that was the contents of the freezer… Digging through the layers of frozen stuff, I kept hearing a song from the Disney movie, “Frozen.” Let it go, let it go …I saw Ziploc bags dated in indelible ink that were older than my college-aged children. I tried to avoid asking Thomas for Continue Reading

Life Changing Laughter With Your Family

Several years ago Thomas phoned with a big announcement, “I have a surprise for everybody. I’m driving up now.” The children and I raced outside, filled with laughter, and saw the object that challenged my wedding vows and changed my life forever—a boat. Not just any boat. A blue boat, its glittering paint sparkling in the sunlight. It reminded me of the Mike Benet pageant gown I wore in the Beaufort Water Festival. The children were thrilled. They thought it was beautiful. Thomas is a man of good taste. Seeing him behind the wheel of that mirage-like, rhinestoned blue sequined Continue Reading

Beauty Pageant World … Humor in the ER

“Just when you think the worst is over…” I told my audience at Ashley River Baptist Church concerning my last 24-hours of stress. I tried to make the events sound funny and stress what a great job I did handling issues. Little did I know that the events to come in “pageant world” would make the last 24 hours seem “blah” … proving once again that life is all about your attitude. I was on my way to celebrate pageant week.  All of us queens from yester-year gussied up for a blast from the past if even for a few seconds of Continue Reading

The Death of Common Sense

Why is it that…… On a plastic dry-cleaning bag you read:  THIS IS NOT A TOY. Liquid Draino’s directions….DO NOT DRINK We yell at our children to stop yelling… The host of the Bachelor appears at the Rose Ceremony with one rose left and says, “There is one rose left.” Or we feel sorry for the contestant on Fear Factor who cries while eating Cow brains with worms. We listen to President speak at the State of the Union Address and afterwards we are told what he said. We watch the Super Bowl for the commercials. The robber who is Continue Reading

Your Mother is Always With You

  Since Mother’s Day is upon us, I thought of some special advice to honor mothers everywhere, and in particular my mother. I miss her every day – her love for me, her laughter and her sense of humor. Here is a poem I found and the author is unknown.  It is touching and meaningful. Your mother is always with you…she’s the whisper of the leaves as you walk down the street; she is the smell of beach in your fresh laundered socks; she’s the cool hand on your brow when you’re not well. Your mother lives inside your laughter and she’s crystallized Continue Reading

Momma's Pink Hair Pick- Remembering My Mother on Mother's Day

In honor of Mother’s Day, I am sharing one of my favorite stories from my book, “Bury Me With My Pearls”.  This award-winning book (SCP Book of the Year)  is on sale and only .99 and a great Mother’s Day gift!   Enjoy this book that is dedicated to my mother, Eleanor McElveen Jenkins. Momma’s Pink Hair Pick I was rummaging around the bottom of my purse when I felt a surprised twinge of pain from some metal prongs.  It was my mother’s infamous pink hair pick that I thought would be the death of her. Even with her heart in a Continue Reading